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Great Scott!
What an absolute catastrophe!!!
Next time use the fire escape.
The stains on my pillow are getting bigger.
How about the stains on my soul?!
You should see the size of my pillow cases. They're 12 inches too long for my pillows.
That's nothing! My mother's pillow was only 10 inches long, she "liked um' tiny" she used to say.
Stop walkin' on my damn tulips!
No! I love walking on flowers!
I have a wart on my thumb, do you think I should be worried about it transferring to other body parts?
I think that you should be worried about that possibility.
So much for the first picks...I'm going to need to go shopping after this.
Yeah! Get some diapers!
Pains me to think, but I just watched my son try to unsuccessfully pour his own juice.
Do you know when the sun comes up?
About 5:30am
What would you rather have longer, anticipation or happiness?
There's someone that is bothering me at work. I need a new job...
Sometimes I just want to eat until I explode!
It sounds a little bit like something is coming. I need to get some sleep!
I've had this going on for about twelve months, and I think it's time I had a doctor take a look at it.
Just looking at the backside of the story is sometimes enough to realize you can't change the future.
My fingers are numb from all the typing I've been doing this weekend. I should get a new hobby!!
There are three types of people in this world. Big ones, little ones, and stupid medium sized ones.
My nose is so stuffed up I almost choked myself taking a sip of water. Time to hit the kettlebell and clear my sinuses!
I think I found something that I need to hide from my wife.
It's been about a week since I first started having symptoms. I think I need to go to the doctor, I think it's getting worse...
Well, I think I've about made it to the end.. I sure hope nothing comes up out of the blue.
Next time i fly first class...I've had enough of this business class non-sense...where is my drink?